Desperate Households Part 4 -- Desperate for Respect

Dear Abba, please help us to remember to always show our men respect. Help us to always be respectful of one another. I've always said that you have to give respect to receive respect. Help us all learn how to give more respect to one another.

Notes...

This one is for us women. It's what our men really truly seek from marriage.

Words of affirmation are important as our words hold more power than what we think.

There are two cycles in marriage. The first one is the crazy cycle. Without love, she reacts (negative words..anger...). Without respect, he reacts.

The second cycle is the energizing cycle. His love motivates her respect and her respect motivates his love.

You must have conquest. Appeciate his desire to work and achieve...don't nag or criticize him for working too hard. Most depression in a man's life comes when he's not working or providing or achieving up to par.

Women need to tell them how much they value their hard work and allow them time to talk about their work day. If you want them to listen to you, then take some time to listen to them.

Spend time with them if they announce big news...such as a promotion. Don't blow it off for later. They need to know that you're excited for them and that their hard work is appreciated.

The husband is to be the head of the home. Wives submit to your husbands and husbands need to love your wives. Husbands do not dominate with evil thoughts over wives and children. Women, if this happens, pray for them in these instances and submit the best way that you can. You are not expected to submit to anything evil as we are to be submissive to God first.

Women want to be treated like princesses without treating their husbands like kings. Go back to the energizing cycle and realize that if we treat them like kings, they'll be motivated to treat us like princesses.

Appreciate him and ooh and aah over him. Don't laugh or be mocking towards him. If there's a problem offer solutions to problems quietly. Appreciate his desire to lead and respect and honor him.

Comedies often show that the men aren't capable and are always making wrong decisions and that the women must do everything.

Women be will willing to put yourselves under your husbands leadership, authority, and direction. Do all you can to respect your husbands and set an example for your children. Women avoid lecturing, criticizing, and preaching at your husbands.

To both the husbands and the wives, look at how you are in your marriage and think about if you would want your son/daughter to marry someone like you one day.

The words we speak have great power.

We need to appreciate his ability to analyze and counsel...fixing things or putting them together without needing directions.

Encourage and motivate him positively to do certain things (cleaning the house or picking up after himself) without nagging or criticizing.

Appreciate his desire for shoulder-to-shoulder companionship and don't worry about all the housework that needs to be done if he just wants you to sit next to him for awhile. He's seeking your closeness and companionship and sometimes may want to talk.

Appreciate his desire for sexual intimacy. Don't deprive one another of sexual needs...Sex is a gift from God for marriage that should not be avoided.

The women's emotional needs must be met and men's sexual intimacy needs must be met. We tend to think only about our needs at the time, however both of your needs deserve to be met.

Wives show respect to your husbands and husbands love your wives the way that Christ loves His church.