Thursday, May 26, 2011

Found an attachment therapist

I had been reading all I can on attachment stuff and the more problems that we've had with Josiah, the more convinced I am that I really need the help of a professional. I had been trying to find an attachment therapist, but the closest one that I could find that took insurance was in Austin. That's a good 3 hours away from us. Anyway, someone had told me about some therapeutic parenting videos on youtube that helped their family and I had watched those about a month ago. I went back to email her and found that she too lives in TX. Anyway, she helped me find a local therapist and I called and set up an appt for July 5. We will go in for an hour interview and then they will set up 4 hours of testing (broken down into two 2 hour segments). The therapist works out of the Dallas office for one week out of every month. I'm just hoping that we can finally get some answers. I strongly believe in my heart that this is what we're dealing with and I am getting really tired of others thinking that they can just fix him. Andy's Mom says "he just needs a grandma." People say "oh, well, he's acting fine here." Yup, because he's not at home. Home is his safe place where he feels safe being himself. Let alone, he has learned to charm others to get what he wants in other places. Yes, he acts up while we're out...he's not people see "glimpses" of what we see here at home. Spend a few days with me here at the house and you can see his behaviors in true form. When Andy is home, he controls it more. When that car pulls out of the driveway, he turns the behaviors up. Why? Because these kids take out the brunt of the behavior on the primary caregiver as when they've been neglected in their first years of life or gone from caregiver to caregiver they have learned not to trust and it becomes a battle of control. These kids are master manipulators and are constantly fighting for control. I was told when fostering that every behavior meets a need and that every foster child had attachment problems to some degree and I see signs in all 3 of our littles, but the girls aren't nearly to the extent that Josiah is. When we get Josiah's testing going, I'm going to ask about getting it done on the girls too. I want healing for all of them. We'll see what the testing says, but in my heart, I strongly believe that this is what we're dealing with. I am just glad that we finally found someone to work with.

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