Sunday, September 30, 2007

Worrying...but trying to remain hopeful



If you look closely...there's the faintest positive line.


Well, I've been bleeding on and off for months now due to my lovely PCOS. The doctor told me that I could go back on fertility meds to straighten my cycle out or go on the pill. Insurance doesn't cover fertility meds and I wasn't willing to part with $3k per month and I didn't want to prevent pregnancy from happening either. So, I started using natural progesterone cream about 3 weeks ago and while the bleeding hasn't totally stopped, it's curtailed it a lot.

I've been feeling very moody, crampy, and my chest started getting a little tender. I'm crying over stupid things and Andy and I have been fighting over the past couple of days over really dumb things. I was trying to get ready to get out the door for Deidra's cheerleading game and had to go to the bathroom (it hit me that I've been spending a lot of time in the bathroom lately and I haven't been feeling all that wonderful either), I leaned down to get something in the bathroom cabinet and saw a leftover pregnancy test and it got me thinking. But, with all the bleeding I've been doing, I thought I was stupid for even wondering. I took it anyway and boy was I shocked when I saw 2 lines pop up. I went and got Andy, had him shut his eyes and put it in his hand while saying "maybe this is why I've been so darn grumpy the past couple of days." Now, I also told him that I wasn't very hopeful about this with all the bleeding that I have been having....not to mention I have no idea how far along I even am as there's no way to tell when my last period was with constant bleeding and spotting.

I decided that I'd take another test this morning after church and I got another positive, however the lines are very faint. This is telling me that it's not looking very well or that I'm very early on in the pregnancy.

I talked to my Mom at church about it (she wanted to know why I was crying in church) and she congratulated me. I told her that I just can't help but feel worried and I just don't think it's going to stick with all the bleeding that has been going on. She told me not to think that way and to remain hopeful. So, I'm trying. I really am.

I guess I'll call the doctor first thing in the morning and see if I can get in and have my blood drawn and see what my numbers look like and if I can get on some progesterone suppositories and we'll do a lot of praying that all will wind up ok.

I think Andy and I are both in so much shock that we just don't know what to think. We never expected this and we're naturally worried with all that has been going on up to this point. Keep us in your prayers if you will.

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4 Comments:

Blogger Lacey said...

Thoughts and prayers going up Jess!!

7:39 AM  
Anonymous Vicki said...

Wow. I am sending some prayers your way. Let us know what the doctor says. Hang in there girl, and Congratulations!

10:17 AM  
Blogger Amy said...

Congratulations! I wish you all the best and will keep you and baby in my thoughts and prayers. Please keep up updated.

3:06 PM  
Blogger Amy said...

Whoops. That should keep us updated.

3:07 PM  

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