Friday, May 09, 2008

Prayers for my Parents...

My Mom is due to take her vows for being a 3rd Order Nun this month. It's on my brother, Jimmie's birthday as a matter of fact. May 18.

My Dad desperately wants to make things right with her and have them get back together. He broke down crying on the phone with me today saying that he really loves her and he just wants things to be right. One minute she's contemplating it and they're friendly towards one another and the next minute she's acting like she doesn't want anything to do with him. He asked me what I thought today and I told him my honest answer. I don't know how to read her anymore. And that's honesty...I don't. One minute she feels one way about something and the next time it comes, she feels completely different. I love her dearly, but she is hard to read. I know she was deeply hurt throughout their divorce and that there are some things that she can't get over. I know she talked to a priest that knew them both during their marriage about what she was obligated to do and he told her that she was obligated to take him back and try again if he wanted to come home. Yet, her current answer is "he waited too long." It's the same thing that I hear when she talks about moving down to where she's taking her Orders to be closer to the convent when I bring up that she prayed for our family to be together again in one spot and now that we're down here, she's talking about moving. "Everyone just waited too long." is what she tells me. Well, she's also the one who's told me before when I've gotten impatient about things "Things happen in God's timing, not ours." So, what if God finally is answering her prayers that our family reconciles (she's prayed for so long that our family would reconcile and my Dad would come home to her and to us) and she's shutting that door. I don't know what to do or how to talk to her about it and my Dad doesn't either, yet I can sense that he's deeply troubled over it all. He told me today "Jess, she doesn't even have to share the same house or the same bedroom with me if she doesn't want that...I just want us to be husband and wife again and share our life and friendship together and as long as neither of us shacked up with anyone else during that, it would all be fine." Only You, dear Abba, know what to do with all of this and how to fix it if it is fixable...I'd like to see them back together and it does us kids a whole lot of good when they're being friendly with one another and we can all hang out and laugh together and I know deep down that they still love each other. I put my family and my parents marriage into Your Hands, Abba. Guide them to do what they are supposed to do with one another, change their hearts and tear down the walls so that they can truly see what they have in one another.

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