Monday, November 22, 2010

Attachment-Focused Parenting Day 1 Part 2

I decided to track behaviors again so that I can see if things get worse or get better. I definitely see that Josiah cannot stand to be put in a time-in. I set them in my lap and put my arms across their chest or abdomen. With him, I'm having to make sure his hands are within my arms or he's started trying to pinch me and do anything he can to push my buttons to get me to react. I don't talk to them when they're in my lap, I just hold them and if they're crying I lightly rub their backs. When our time is up, then I stand them up while I'm sitting on the floor, I hold hands with them, get eye contact, and then I talk to them about what happened and what they're feeling, they get plenty of empathy, and we talk about the rules as well. The girls are responding really well so far to it, but Josiah is trying anything and eveyrthing that he can...he'll scream "ow, you're hurting me, my tummy hurts, I have to go potty," just anything and everything that he can think of. Emma even went so far to tell him "will you be quiet? mommy isn't hurting you, she's just holding you." I had to stifle a chuckle. I have to redirect them to another room though or they will stand there and make comment after comment trying to micromanage each other. I have to keep reminding them that I will parent them or Daddy will, but that they don't have to parent each other. Anyway, I'm going to start blogging about our time ins and who's getting it and for what just so that I can see if it's getting better or worse.

8 am Josiah TI as he wouldn't quit bugging Deidra when she was sick and trying to rest

8:15 am Josiah TI for not wanting to sit quietly and he was constantly testing me (where do I sit? right here? he'd get up and move...right here?...finally he threw himself on the floor...then got up and ran behind where he was supposed to be sitting even though I was giving him clear instructions the whole time)

9 am Josiah TI not leaving the foot stool on the recliner alone even though they know they're not supposed to have it out of the chair

10:45 am Josiah TI getting into stuff in Mommy and Daddy's bathroom when he was supposed to be emptying the trash

12:15 pm Tracie TI getting into stuff in the pantry that was supposed to be in time out (toys)

4:25 pm Emma and Josiah TI not being quiet when asked

4:30 pm Tracie TI wouldn't give Emma some space like Emma asked her to

4:40 pm Emma TI lying to get Tracie in trouble

6:00 pm Emma TI wouldn't leave the light switches alone

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